family ties

this past weekend, my parents--dad & stepmom to be specific--came for a short visit. they drove out from oklahoma and brought me the dining table that's been in my family for four generations. i'll post more about the table & its history later.

my dad likes to be on the go. sitting still at home has never been his thing. and my stepmom is a good match for him--she enjoys being on the go and doesn't mind going with the flow, very important when traveling with my dad or just being related to him. i have to say, i'm very lucky in my dad's choice of a second wife. they've been married for 15 years now and had dated for about 3 years before that. she's a great lady & lots of fun. and she's a very wise & grace filled person.

not long after she and my dad became serious, my dad tried to push her as part of the family. my parents had been divorced about 2 years and i was just starting to really deal with the divorce. a stepmom was more than i was ready for at the time. judy and i had lunch at her request. she told me she'd met my mom and that i had a wonderful mom. she told me she'd like for the two of us to become friends, but that she was fine with whatever pace i wanted to do that at. i really didn't want to like her, but i had to respect her graciousness and directness. eighteen years later, i just love her. she and i stayed up late talking after my dad had dozed off and it was one of the best parts of their visit. and there's a great deal of the time i think i perplex my dad. she takes it in stride and helps smooth things over and tries to explain it to him--and when she can't and he still doesn't get me, she makes sure he just accepts me as i am. she also does the same for him when he's driving me nuts.


there is one little quirk about my stepmom, that has become a bit of family comedy. she likes for her and my dad to dress alike. exactly alike. as much as possible. and since hanging out in san diego is casual, well, here's day 1 of their matching outfits during the visit...

and yes, there were matching outfits for the rest of the visit. it used to mortify me, but now, i'm used to it and rather amused by it. and since they obviously make each other happy...well, it's okay with me. as long as they don't want me to dress like them too!